The Integral Role That Parents Play In the Education of Their Children

Parents, not teachers, should direct their children’s education. No buts, no exceptions. Every once in a while, this direction may mean the involvement of teachers, school administrators, or other professionals as somewhat “advisors” for the children’s educational plan, but they will not be the ones to decide what to and not to do, and determine what should and should not be. It if should have been the other way around, then parents should have been dubbed “second teachers”, and not teachers being dubbed as “second parents”.

It is the parents’ responsibility to make their children learn and understand the most important things and lessons in life; lessons that cannot be explained by the scribbles on a blackboard or the typewritten letters on the pages of a textbook. Some parents enroll their children in prestigious schools and leave it at that, thinking that everything will be taken care of and everything needed to be learned will be taught. Sure, they will learn everything they need to; everything except preparing themselves to become adults. It is very sad to see many parents forgetting that experience is one’s best education. In fact, education without experience is not education at all.

Imagine this; the eldest of your children grows up and only a short while after graduating from high school, he gets married. A year goes by, and you learn that he and his wife decided to get separated. You ask him why and he tells you that you that they always fight about money and work, and that the marriage was not going to work. Now, did the knowledge on husband-wife relationships that he acquired in this school that you entrusted your children’s education to, save their marriage? Were the steps in problem solving helpful? So what if they have the ability to make any desired program function if they cannot make a marriage work?

Any responsible and mature parent would agree that marrying that early was not a very wise decision in the first place. This is not to say it is wrong to marry early, since we all have our own views of what is right and what is wrong. What I am indeed saying is that marrying early is not practical for one who has just graduated, has not saved up much, and has no experience whatsoever on making big decisions. In fact, quarrels over money and work are very shallow reasons for a separation. If both the man and woman are truly mature enough to start a family, then they would not have fought over money and work issues in the first place. Did they not exchange vows to be together “for better or for worse”, “in sickness and in health”, promising that only death will part them? As you can see from this example, school cannot take the place of experience as the vital part of your children’s education. As parents, it is your responsibility to take care that your children grows up exposed to the truths in life and guided by your experience, in order for them to make it on their own once they assume their independence.

A Guide for Parents Seeking Help for Special Children’s Education

Special children’s education can be a touchy subject for parents. Most of the time, parents would be the ones seeking out that needed extra assistance when children begin to show signs of autism. This is not to say that schools are not doing anything to help, when they should. For all we may know, they could be trying to find help but the given circumstances just makes it easier said than done. Reality tells us that the funding for special education is low, its resources are limited, and the waiting lists are long.

This does not mean, however, that all hope is lost. Sometimes, such as in these situations, being squeaky is necessary if it would mean getting the grease. If you are among the parents who are seeking educational help for their special children, here are some advices to get you started:

First, make the first move and start today. Do not rely on your child’s school because, chances are, they will not take in the problem. You might get the attention you want at first, but most often, schools will just dismiss initial concerns at the end of the day. Time is precious here; do not waste it dealing with them. You could complain, and begin your squeaking with them, but what for? It would get you nowhere since the school will not exactly be the one to provide help anyway. Like you, they will just be seeking that help from the higher organizations that focus on special children’s education. Furthermore, unless you know someone on the inside, the school is practically your only means of reaching those organizations. Thus, no matter how frustrating it could be, do not antagonize them. Rather, be friends with them. It could prove to be helpful.

Second, if you can afford to hire professionals to work for your child’s case, being organized is vital. Failure to attend one meeting will already count against you. Be sure to keep every document given to you throughout the entire duration of the case such as notes on meetings, reports and results.

Third, be patient. The testing process will take time so you might need to wait for long. Sadly, many parents who badly need to get the testing over with resort to privately hiring someone to speed up the process. While waiting, do your homework. The more information you can get about the condition of your child, the better it will be for you to get help.

And fourth, know your rights. Do not hesitate to complain to higher authorities if your child’s school is still not doing anything to help your child after you have long communicated your concerns. Special children’s education is not to be taken granted. You have all the right to seek legal assistance so speak up if you have to.

The Five Foundations of Any Child’s Education

“Is the education of a child important?” This might just be the most ridiculous and obvious question ever asked. Ask any parent this question and for sure, you will get the same answer again and again. However, if the question had asked for the reason behind this importance, there will, without a doubt, be many different answers. One parent may say “So he will be able to easily get a job”. Another may say that it is important so that his child will learn responsibility. Another reason could be that the child’s learning will help him make good decisions. Parents have countless other reasons for a child’s education but ultimately, they mean the same thing—to prepare the child for adulthood.

Some might disagree with this; in fact, many parents do not want to think of adulthood yet, saying they do not want their children to grow up fast. Well nobody said anything about reaching adulthood fast. Rather, it is progressing from childhood and growing up to be adults. You have to bear in mind that in the end, only two things can happen: your child grows up with you, with your guidance, or your child grows up without you, guided by his friends. Which ending do you want for your child?

Surely, you want your child to grow up guided by you. If you are to prepare them to become responsible adults, you must make them learn, understand and live by five essential things. The proper education of a child involves the teaching of values, morals, ethics, problem-solving, and decision-making.

Values are the feelings, thoughts and opinions which your family has determined important. The values of one family may, of course, differ from those of another. A child needs to learn what the things he values are. Morals refer to what things are right and what are wrong. Usually, our morals are shaped by a bigger community’s standards and beliefs. Every child must be able to distinguish right from wrong. Ethics refer to the ideology of how one should behave. These are the principles of conduct and manners. A child will follow what he sees. If parents are not there to show the child how one should rightfully behave, he will then follow those whom he sees; he will pattern the way his peers behave.

Problem solving is the ability to come up with a solution for a particular task or difficulty AND the ability to do everything required to carry it out. Knowing that sand can put out a spreading fire is useless if you do not know where and how to get that sand. A child must be able to determine what must be done with a problem and know to do it. Lastly, decision-making is the ability to make sound decisions that will be for the betterment of all. A good decision is one that is based on the first four essential principles. A child must learn have the ability to make good judgments and sound decisions so that he will be able to determine which direction to follow.

These five elements shape the entire education of a child. Without these five, your child may grow physically and biologically, but he will never grow from being a child to becoming an adult.

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A Classroom Cannot Substitute The Real World

Like most parents, you are probably thinking that a decent school with high standards of teaching is enough to ensure the proper education for your child. This is not true. A good school may and most likely will provide your child sufficient “academic” knowledge, but education is not limited to subjects like history, language, math and the sciences alone. There is more to education than the ability to summarize the life of Julius Caesar, explain the symbolisms used by Shakespeare, calculate limits at infinity, and recite the names of all the constellations of the night sky. In fact, a background on these things is important but in the end, you and I both know that your child will not survive the real world if these were all he knows. Even if schools teach values education subjects, knowing what is “ideal” is not enough when he finally comes across what is “real”.

Learning achieved in school is not enough once your child’s out there in the real world. What one reads in books, no matter how much your child has memorized them, will not help him if he has not been there firsthand. Real education is achieved through experience. Life requires that a person learns and understands certain things—things that cannot be learned inside a classroom. One must experience something in order to understand it. Likewise, the education for your child if he is to become prepared for adulthood, must involve being exposed to what really happens once you are an adult.

The best real examples from whom he can learn are of course, his parents and immediate family, and the community. A child must observe, learn and understand how adults function in order to survive, how one should balance time and handle money responsibly, and how one should act and speak if somebody lost a loved one. He must also experience failure, so that he would know how to stand up if he fails again. He must know and experience how to apologize, express gratitude, forgive, solve problems, and make decisions. He must know how one should behave in parties, how spouses should give and take, how to raise a child well, and how to respect the opinions of other people. These are some examples of the things that make up the real education for your child.

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